Recipes

Sparkling Pomegranate Punch

Punch your way into the New Year with this glass of class. MAKE 2019 FEAR YOU ESTABLISH DOMINANCE EARLY.

Happy New Year's Bitches 

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Beastless Feasts

As we do every holiday season we put together this dope database of recipes from our site and books to help you survive the season. If you already got our books, you're probably a well-adjusted and beautiful person.

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Chickpea Dumpling Soup

This stew is thick as fuck and tasty as hell. If you have never had a version of this Southern staple then GET THE FUCK ON IT.

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Cranberry Spritzer

Cranberry sauce is a holiday leftover that just keeps on givin. You can put that shit in a sandwich, mix it in a salad, or even a cocktail. So go rescue that cranberry sauce from the back of the fridge and GET LIT WITH LEFTOVERS.

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Roasted Broccolini Herb Noodles

COLON CANCER AIN'T FUCKING AROUND. You gotta eat more broccoli bc it's like a toothbrush for your asshole. It's way more effective and a HELLUVALOT CHEAPER than a juice cleanse.

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Pumpkin Chili

It's that time of year when it's pumpkin spiced everything but you need somethin heartier than a goddamn latte.

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Hot Chocolate Mix

This winter why not treat yourself to something like a big mug of this holiday hottie? Or if you’re the generous type, throw a bunch of this mix in a jar, slap a fucking bow on it, and now you’ve got a cheap and tasty gift.

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