Summertime is the best time for fruit but don’t limit that shit to only dessert. Grill up whateverthefuck looks good and throw it in a salad or on some grains. I tossed peaches in with some soy sauce and noodles because I just don’t give a fuck. That shit was delicious and I had leftovers for days. FUCK SHARING.
I know you need caffeine sometimes but don’t even fucking think about reaching for a RedBull or 5-Hour Energy. I will slap that shit out of your hand so quick you won’t know whatthefuck happened. Energy drinks are toxic and fucking expensive. Money doesn’t grow on trees; coffee does. Don’t waste your time in a fucking line and spend your hard earned cash on something you can make while you’re sleeping. Cold brewed coffee is also way less acidic, making this easier on your stomach. SO GRAB A CUP OF THIS SIMPLE SHIT AND SEIZE THE GODDAMN DAY.
Clear room on the grill for these stuffed sons of bitches. They pack a lot more flavor and nutrition than some lazy, played-out veggie kebabs. This shit is loaded: Beta-Carotene, Vitamin C, Fiber and B Vitamins. And that's just the goddamn peppers. And no, you don’t eat the stem; you throw it at whoeverthefuck brought veggie kebabs.
BUFFALO HAVE BALLS NOT WINGS, so you know this meal is legit. When was the last time you had a kick in the fucking taste buds? These spicy sons of bitches are high in heat but low in fat because they’re baked not fried. So grab a cold drink and a fist full of celery, YOU'RE GOING TO FUCKING NEED'EM.
SLAM DOWN THIS GLASS OF BOSS SAUCE FOR BREAKFAST AND TELL YOUR GROWLING STOMACH TO SHUT THE FUCK UP. This shit has enough strawberries to give you a full day’s worth of vitamin C. Then you got rolled oats up in this bitch to start your morning with some fiber. All you have to do is fill the blender and press a fucking button. No doubt even your sleepy ass can handle that simple shit in the early morning. Get to work. Get Promoted. Get Paid.
NO SHIT IT'S HOT, IT'S FUCKING JULY. Pull yourself together, go find some shade, and kick back with Thug Kitchen’s citrus iced tea. Guaranteed to refresh your attitude and show your BBQ guests that you’ve got shit figured out. Even if you don’t.