Only Rookies Leave CookiesThis year get Santa Sconed
Dec 23, '15

You mean to tell me there’s some motherfucker that builds toys in his house on a sheet of ice all year then delivers them in one night and you’re just gonna fucking offer him store-bought cookies? Not sure how you were raised but we treat our magical guests with some goddamn respect ‘round here. Whether that old man visits you or not, bake a batch of these sweet sons of bitches and get sconed for the holidays.

GET OFF THAT BLAND BANDWAGONand fuck with some flavor this holiday
Nov 18, '15

Once a year people do this weird thing and get all fucking jazzed about eating a big ass bird that looks like a poor-man’s peacock. If turkey really tasted that good then everyone would be cooking those fuckers year round. But nobody does that shit for a reason. Spend this Thanksgiving with something worth carving up with this mix of fall flavors wrapped in a warm hug that is puff pastry. Do right by yourself this holiday and stop the bland bird bandwagon. #flipthebird

This dish was featured in a New York Daily News interview with some of our other holiday recommendations. 

HULK THE FUCK OUTwith this green machine
Nov 06, '15

This smoothie, from the lovely ladies at Simple Green Smoothies, tastes like a creamsicle but without all motherfucking food dye and corn syrup. Packed with protein, fiber, vitamin E, and potassium this lean, green, nutritional machine is a legit post workout treat you can whirl up after impressing everyone at the gym. Or after rolling outta bed at noon and flexing in the mirror. No judgment.

Want more badass blender recipes? Grab the new book by Simple Green Smoothies and start eating better with the push of a button.

Eat a saladwith some balls
Oct 19, '15

Our collab with The Meatball Shop went so well that the vegan balls SOLD. THE FUCK. OUT. Big thanks to the crew at TMS and everyone who stopped by to try the balls. For anyone who got there after they sold out and for everybody who lives outside NYC, WE GOT YOU. Here’s the recipe to cook up your own set of balls and add them to a sandwich, pasta, salad, whateverthefuck you’re into. Cook up a batch and ball hard.

Bake some of thesePumpkin Ginger Blondiesand start your fall on the fucking ball
Oct 02, '15

Don’t waste another Fall by settling for some lesser seasonal treat. That overhyped bullshit distracts from the real fucking reason for the season: DESSERT. Bake these bitches up and you’ll realize pumpkin is better chewed, not sipped.

Serve up a big ass bowl of sunshinewith this grilled veggie couscous salad
Aug 20, '15

Tired of the same old mayo-mess of pasta salad spoiling in the summer sun? Ditch that cream colored bullshit and get with this fiber rich son of a bitch. Between all these ripe summer veggies, the fresh basil, and the grill marks, you’ve got a new prized picnic dish without all the fat in that pile of pale pasta. Fuck mayo, EAT SOME SUNSHINE.

Too damn hot to grill?Find some shade and have a fucking picnic
Jul 01, '15

Need plans for this extra long summer weekend? Cook up some Thug Kitchen classics and get your ass outside. These recipes are tried and true summer staples and the public park down the street is free. Set up somewhere you can watch some fireworks if your neighborhood does that shit. And you know someone is gonna be popping them off regardless of restrictions. Tasty food, people-watching, and possibly illegal pyrotechnics make for a pretty kickass weekend.

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